just joking

A New Yorker’s Hurricane Experience, as Told Through Gifs

jezebelcom:

Everyone totally overreacted to Hurricane Irene last year, which ended up just being a really rainy evening. So when people started freaking out about Hurricane Sandy and  essentially preparing for the apocalypse I was like:

But several days later, in Sandy’s aftermath I’m like:

Read More

FLOSS

The other night I had a gruesome nightmare where I was flossing in front of the mirror and my teeth started to fall out. The interior of my mouth immediately started to decay, turn black and grey and ooze blood. I had only flossed between two or three pairs of teeth on my right side when I stopped, fearing that the situation could somehow get even worse- like maybe I would start to pull off my face like in Poltergeist. I was terrified.

Now this dream could simply mean that I better fucking floss soon or else my mouth is going to turn into a decrepit wreck and I’m going to need dentures by next year. I’d kind of be like Rebecca from TLC’s Breaking Amish!

However the meaning to my nightmare simply could NOT be that I need to floss. I mean I do need to floss. I don’t think I’ve flossed in over a month (I know, disgusting), but there has to be something else to it! Thankfully, this is where my iPhone came in handy. At around 1am last night I downloaded iDream, a dream interpreting application that allows the user to search and browse for meanings and also keep a dream journal. I frantically searched for “teeth” and got an array of scenarios and meanings behind them. According to iDream, an “ordinary” dream about teeth means that I’ve come into “unpleasant contact with sickness.” Awesome. One of my friends recently had scabies and I just bought a sweatshirt from a thrift store that smelled like feces. As I scrolled down the scenarios that applied to my nightmare and read through what different teeth dreams meant, I began to worry:

“If you lose your teeth, you wil have burdens which will crush your pride and demolish your affairs.”

“To examine your teeth, warns you to be careful of your affairs, as enemies are lurking near you.”

“If they appear decayed and snaggled, your business or health will suffer from intense strains.”

“To dream of spitting out teeth, portends personal sickness, or sickness in your immediate family.”

“Imperfect teeth is one of the worst dreams. It is full of mishaps for the dreamer. A loss of estates, failure of persons to carry out their plans and desires, bad health, depressed conditions of the nervous system for even healthy persons.”

Even dreams that entail loosing one to all teeth foretell bad news, unhappiness, sickness, death and famine.

I know I shouldn’t believe anything this stupid app says, but I’ve always been curious about dreams. Sigmund Freud, Carl Jung, and Calvin S. Hall all studied the mysterious world of dreams. Freud believed that dreams were a person’s repressed unconscious animalistic or sexual wishes (sometimes) disguised in hidden messages. Contrary to his mentor, Freud, Jung thought that dreams were a way of your subconscious communicating with your conscious and that they were extremely personal. Hall took a more cognitive approach to the meaning of dreams and analyzed the actions, objects, interactions and settings within them.

There are probably millions of websites that can help people interpret their dreams. Are they actually legitimate sources? I’m guessing not, but I still like to use them. Other than every day problems that normal people face, I think my life is pretty good. I’m happy with how things are going. Hopefully nothing will take a turn for the worse…and if it does, I guess I got my warning.